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A Crappy Eater’s 100% Honest Review Of Daily Harvest

Fine, I admit it: I started ordering Daily Harvest mostly because a lady I saw in their Instagram ads looked so adorably thrilled with her life. But I also started ordering Daily Harvest because I tried a chocolate-based smoothie at a fancy smoothie place near my dance studio, and became obsessed with chocolate-based smoothies. Except chocolate-based smoothies that you buy at fancy smoothie places are like ten bucks, and I have better things to spend ten bucks on. Like three jumbo-sized bags of salt and vinegar potato chips.

My attention to nutritional value, in case you were curious, starts and stops with the question of whether or not existing solely on hastily-consumed discarded spoonfuls of (Annie's! Organic!) macaroni and cheese will eventually kill me. (I'm pretty sure it won't. Jury's still out.)

So having been a Daily Harvest subscriber for a couple of months now, and given the fact that I don't do things like subscribe to smoothie delivery-places, I figured it was time to give you my (100% honest, zero-sponsored) rundown.

Crafts for the Uncrafty

“Cave Of Wonders” Birthday Cake (With Rainbow Interior)

I want to be humble about this one, but it took me five hours, so I'm not going to be. (Granted, the creation process might have been slowed down ever-so-slightly by the fact that I was catching up on the 2-part season finale of The Bachelorette while fondant-ing, but STILL.)

So. To recap, the make-an-impossibly-fancy-birthday-cake-for-my-child tradition started with the Mermaid Cake (a process that began with my friend Alisa taking pity on me and teaching me how to make a cake that did not turn out like this).

Then came the Spooky Ghost Cake, the Moana Cake, the Bloodshot Eyeball Cake, and the Tie-Dye Rainbow Cake. This year my daughter suggested a "Moana Rainbow Unicorn Mermaid Cake," but I gently steered her in the direction of something a) new, and b) not that, because the chances of me executing that extremely specific vision were zero, and?

Entertaining

Let’s Do This: Cave Of Wonders Fifth Birthday Party

OK, so I know I literally just - like, just - wrote about how I'm *over* entertaining. But one of the great joys in my life these past few years has been going all-in with the kids' birthday parties. Last year we moved to LA only a couple of weeks before my son's birthday, so I gave myself a pass with that one...but my daughter is about to turn five and all the girl wants in life is a ridiculously cool birthday cake.

And so a ridiculously cool birthday cake is what she's (hopefully) going to get.

A ridiculously cool birthday cake, however, requires a theme. So far we've done mermaids, Moana, and rainbows, all of which my daughter suggested doing again...but come on. This is an OPPORTUNITY.

Entertaining

Come On Over

I’ve been writing recently about how my attitude towards entertaining has chilled out in the extreme these past few months. I’m sure I still have a fancy hors d’oeuvre recipe or two in me, but what I’ve discovered since removing virtually all of the fuss from my get-togethers with friends and neighbors is that that’s all it is: fuss. The point is to be with each other, and - especially when lots and lots of young children are involved - the easier we can make it to do that, the more we…do it. 

Take the other night, for example: My neighbor Margo spontaneously invited us over to swim. I hesitated for a moment, because it was 4:30 PM, so not quite dinnertime, but also right in that sweet spot where I’d have to start making dinner soon or risk the kids being awake into the hour when Mom really needs to commence the bath-taking and watching of Handmaid’s Tale, which is - let’s be honest - unacceptable.

ENTREES

Sherry’s Most Perfectest Lasagna Ever (With A Secret Ingredient)

I've never been a huge fan of lasagna. I think that this dates back to a mild trauma when I was thirteen and announced that henceforth I would be a vegetarian, or at least until I changed my mind and wanted a hamburger one day (which did actually end up happening). My mother's reaction to this news was to completely ignore me and continue sneaking meat into meals anyway. She made her "special lasagna" frequently during this period, and it was a solid two years before she admitted that the "mushrooms" had, in fact, been...well, not mushrooms. (I was apparently not the most observant teenager.)

But apart from my mother's egregious conduct, I feel like lasagna should be more amazing than it usually is. I mean, it's layered pasta, cheese, and sauce. How could that not be absolutely perfect, every time? Except far too often I find lasagna has too much of one thing, and not enough of another. I want my lasagna to be red sauce-y, and cheesy, and otherwise uncomplicated by unnecessary additions like, say, peppers (BLECH).

For our girls' weekend in Tahoe, each of us was assigned a meal to prepare. This was Alisa's mom's friend Sherry's dish, and it was the best lasagna I have ever, ever, ever tasted (sorry, mom). The secret ingredient? A touch of cheddar cheese. I'm aware that that doesn't sound like a good idea, but this lasagna was transcendent. So you're going to have to trust me.


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