And Here Is Why I Am Ancient

Karlie Kloss in the March issue of Vogue Paris

I pretty much look like this when I work out, except not Karlie Kloss, not wearing couture, and not even a tiny bit badass. 

You know my “workout” that I’ve been doing every night for the past couple of weeks? Apparently I am so cripplingly out of shape that jogging in place in my living room is enough to throw my sad, ancient body into massive disrepair requiring the use of anti-inflammatory medication and something called “arnica.” I am presently laying flat on my back on my couch with my foot elevated on a couple of pillows, staring at an ankle so puffy that I may have to actually go see a doctor. From an injury that I got while doing squats in front of The Bachelor.

Sprained ankle with bandage

When your pedicure is this bad you use the blur tool.

I can’t even.

Now I also can’t even do half the things I was pretending were legit exercise, which sucks also because I was totally – and weirdly – enjoying myself with this whole “moving instead of doing my best amoeba impression” thing. I’m still trying to get in a few sit ups and leg-lift things every night because those don’t involve my ankle, but all actual locomotion has come to a standstill.

I’m annoyed.

Here is some cute workout clothing to look at in case you can do things like moving, because I apparently can’t.

P.S. I know: there are things I can do that won’t result in strains like this. I just discovered thanks to a friendly neighbor that our local Y has a playspace for your kids to hang out in while you bop around on the ellipticals and take Pilates classes and such. Done. (Or at least “done” in a few weeks, once I’m de-bandaged and functioning like a normal person again.)

Links & Love & Stuff

Jordan Reid's I Want To Be Her interview

:) Click over to I Want To Be Her for a fun interview in which I talk my five favorite finds of the moment, including the best-smelling candle ON THE PLANET (I mean that), footwear that I surprised myself by wearing quite literally into the ground, and the ultimate tired-eyes pick-me-up.

:) Here is the blouse that will absolutely make your spring/summer wardrobe. (It is expensive. It might just be worth it.)

:) “To be honest, a peek inside my mind most days would probably look like X-Wings and TIE Fighters,” responded every husband in the world. (Mom’s Bedtime Doodle Shows The Thoughts Of A Multi-Tasker, via Today.)

:) I paid attention to the Superbowl for exactly forty-six seconds (that would be the length of the Ryan Reynolds/Hyundai ad, which was fine but…you know, kind of “eh” about Ryan Reynolds these days), choosing instead to focus on the absolutely insane amount of food my friends and I set out. I do kind of wish I had watched more of the commercials, though; this recap (via Slate) is a good one for those of you who also were more about tacos than TV on Sunday.

:) Speaking of Superbowl food: I have discovered a recipe that you need to try. Trader Joe’s Party Meatballs + heated-up, mixed-together BBQ sauce and grape jelly (yes, grape jelly). Try it. Oh my god.

Mom Bod sweatshirt on glam camp

:) We redesigned our Mom Bod sweatshirt; it’s now suuuuuuper soft and fits great (that’s the old version pictured above, along with my beloved ModCloth pillow). I’ll shoot it soon so you can see what it looks like on, but in the meantime you can check it out here.

:) These espadrilles (in denim) are kind of insane and I would fall off of them immediately. But they’re also sort of…irresistible.

:) Love this bookshelf makeover on Gala Darling – super cute (and great tips!).

:) I feel like if you picked up a pair of these maternity jeans, they are literally the only thing you would want to wear throughout your entire pregnancy. They’re GOOD.

:) I didn’t know that it was possible for me to want to hang out with a person less than I want to hang out with Gisele Bundchen, but there you go. (How Hollywood’s Favorite Juice Bar Owner Eats Every Day, via Elle.) Related: this article on The Frisky lays out what it costs to eat like this lady.

:) It is so hot out this week (EIGHTY DEGREES YESSSS) that I am presently cutting all of my jeans into shorts. Also lusting over this high-waisted, super-chic denim pair.

Crescent moon gold and diamond earrings

:) Crescent moon earrings with teeny-tiny diamonds = perfection. (Pick up a pair here.)

:) “Don’t read the comments” has become a joke among those who make their living on the Internet, but all this does is serve to normalize a culture of serious – and pervasive – online harassment. This article offers an alternative. (Against ‘Don’t Read the Comments,’ via Medium.)

:) OK. She gets a medal. (50 Million People Have Watched This Video Of A Mom Dressing Her 4 Kids In The Morning, via Redbook.)

:) “In any given race featuring a female candidate, there will always be a Bernie Sanders who can do what she can’t do and say what she can’t say. And if there will always be a Bernie Sanders, then there may never be a female president of the United States.” (The Secret To Bernie Sanders’ Success? He’s Not A Woman, via Slate.)

:) Every time I read yet another study proving that meditation is actually, scientifically, quantitatively like the best thing you can possibly do for yourself and your body and your mind and your life, I get inexplicably annoyed. I’m aware that this probably means that I should meditate. (Harvard Unveils MRI Study Proving Meditation Literally Rebuilds the Brain’s Gray Matter in 8 Weeks, via Feel Guide.)

Little Miss…Gap

Little Miss Hug and Mr. Strong books by Roger Hargreaves

Remember these books?!?! Hello #nostalgia.

On Saturday morning, I did a reading of a few Roger Hargreaves books to benefit Milk & Bookies and the Boys & Girls Club of America – the children who came to the reading brought books to be distributed to the local club. Similar readings were held at Gap locations all over the country that day because the store just released a collection of (adoooooorable) Little Miss and Mr. Man-themed clothing. They tricked out the events with little thematic cookies and coloring stations and such, and it was all kinds of cute and just the best way to start a weekend ever.

Milk & Bookies book drive and reading at the Gap

(My little helper, as you can see, did not detach from my leg for the duration of the reading.)

P.S. If you’d like to host your own book drive, click here for more info on how to get involved with Milk & Bookies.

Le Find

Food trucks at the Treasure Island Flea Market

See ya. I bought my Ikea Malm dresser – you know, the one you also own (or perhaps just used to own if you are better than I am at replacing college furniture with grownup furniture) – thirteen years ago. Since...

The Everpresent Orange

Homemade orange infused vodka recipe

Today in Things That I Do That Make Very Little Sense: I take enormous, completely unfounded pride in our orange tree (you know, the one that I freaked out over when we first arrived at our new home). When people...

At The Bay

Kids playing on the beach in the winter

{ Jeans (similar) | Boots | Hat | Bag | Blouse } If I could clone this weekend and do it again and again all year long, I totally would. You may have noticed that we go on what might be...

Links & Love & Stuff

Democratic Presidential Candidate Valentine's Day cards from glam camp

 These Democratic Primary candidate Valentine’s Day cards are Hillar-ious (hee) and ship for free (!) and will totally get to you on time for V-Day if you order by Feb 8.  I just picked up my new favorite white button-down at Anthropologie:...

The Popcorn Problem

IMG_2785 (1)

I have this problem: I eat so much microwave popcorn.  It’s kind of my thing; I’m very weird and hoarder-y about it and extremely particular about how much butter and salt goes on it. I eat it in highly specific little ways,...