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Simplify All The Everythings

Sweater + Earrings via Rent the Runway

I do not want to cook right now. Or maybe ever again. I also do not want to spend $85 a night on takeout, but for real: the whole simmering-of-sauces-and-sprinkling-of-delicate-herbs is not happening at the moment; what’s on the menu is whatever is in the refrigerator and takes three to five minutes to get onto a plate. 

So it’s back to the meal delivery services, except now I’m leaning away from ones that make me do things like chop onions, and towards ones that send me onions all nice and pre-chopped. (I used to think that this was cheating. Except now I realize that hello, I know how to chop onions. I do not need to chop onions ever again in order to prove this to myself.) What you see here is from HungryRoot - they’re a vegan delivery service (although they’re introducing some fish and meat in the New Year), and yet somehow phenomenally delicious (weird), and the food takes literally (LITERALLY) three to five minutes to make. I don’t get it, but I don’t care. 

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All My Thanksgiving-ish Recipes, In One Handy Post

Thanksgiving centerpiece by The Bouqs

This Thanksgiving, I will be in New York, with my parents. My own children will be in Ohio with Kendrick and his family, and so this year - for the first time in god knows how long - it'll be just the three of us again, sitting around the table that we sat around every night of my childhood. My dad will rag on my mom for the turkey being too dry. My mom will dress up for dinner (but just a little). I will definitely screw up the Brussels sprouts.

I'm not sad about it, not exactly. Thanksgiving has always been sort of a crapshoot holiday for us - sometimes we're with Kendrick's family, sometimes we're with mine, sometimes we're with friends (and if you're wondering whether looking at those posts I just linked to made me cry, the answer is: yes. obviously). So it's not like there are any huge traditions that we'll be breaking (Christmas is another story; I can't even go there right now).

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Oh Dear. It’s Sugar Month.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year, according to my children: Sugar Month. Yes yes, Halloween is technically one day, but that little detail appears to have escaped my two sugar monsters, who are under the impression that the second those first leaves fall, it’s all-chocolate, all-the-time. (I blame grocery stores; can we PLEASE put those ten-pound snack-size assortment bags on shelves beyond the reach of a four-year-old? …Please?)

Herein lies the problem: When children know that candy is (allegedly) on the menu, they’re not super interested in anything else, and especially not in coming inside because dinner is ready. No, they’re very, very busy hiding on the front porch with the trick-or-treat buckets that they pulled out of storage sometime in August and filled with pilfered munchies, thinking that Mom doesn’t know what they’re up to. (Spoiler: Mom knows everything.) 

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Gonna Just Call This “Jordan Pasta”

I've been posting recipes to the Internet for nearly ten years. And the fact that I have never posted the one recipe I make more than any other - I literally make it once a week at minimum - is...weird, to say the least. But what happens is that every time I make it and think, "Oh, I should take some shots and post about this!" I figure come on, suuuurely I already have, and so then I just go ahead and eat it.

Except last night I did a quick search on my site while I was stirring the sauce, and: nope. I've never posted it. (Why it took me this many years to "do a quick search while stirring the sauce" is a question I cannot answer for you.)

This recipe is technically named for my son, but ok, I'll tell you the truth: I named it after my son because he loves it, yeah yeah, but mostly because love it, and now whenever I make it I get to seem like an amazing parent who is making her son's favorite meal for dinner while actually eating...my favorite meal. (Very selfless over here.)


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