Parenting

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ramshackle glam kids jordan Reid

This is not the face of someone without a diabolical plan.

In lieu of an actual, information-containing post today - because I have to spend the day working on an insane number of side projects (including logistics surrounding a verrrrrrryyyyy exciting project that I'll be able to formally announce in a week or so - hint: book book book book book), allow me to present to you a series of outtakes from the holiday gift guide shoot I did with Kim Ebbets last night.

Just trust me and scroll down slowly. It's so good.

Lifestyle

Time To Talk About It

I'm putting up a link roundup today and it's all pajama suggestions and fun reads, and...I just can't hit publish without posting this first, because pajamas are not where my head's at.

You know, I was brought up believing that guns - all of them - are bad. Nobody should have a gun; all they do is perpetuate violence; et cetera.

That's not what I think anymore; I've formed my own opinions about guns and gun owners. I can't think of a single reason for any human being to own an assault rifle, but I'm friends with many people who own shotguns or pistols, and I understand and respect their choices. They are - without exception - extremely knowledgeable about their guns, having been raised to respect them for what they are: deadly weapons. They would be more than happy to submit to a background check at any point, because why wouldn't they?

Lifestyle

The New-Parent Sex Situation (Spoiler: It Ain’t Good)

Let's talk about the post-baby sex situation, shall we? Spoiler: It ain't good. I know it; all of my parent friends know it; you probably know it. And still: it's easy to feel embarrassed - even ashamed - about how much (or, ok, how little) you have sex with your spouse once a tiny, screaming human arrives on the scene.

When sex suddenly starts feeling less like an awesomely fun pastime and more like an exhausting obligation, it's easy to wonder whether something's wrong with you.

Can we clear the air, please?

DIARY

#MomFail

I posted a video to Instagram Stories yesterday, and I'm really annoyed at myself about it. In the video, taken outside my son's piano teacher's house, I said that I had just realized that I'd forgotten to bring his piano music to the lesson for the second time in a row, and said it feels sometimes like my life is just one Mom Fail after the next. I forget the music. I'm late to pickup. I don't include vegetables in lunch (or dinner, sometimes). I love, love, love it when they're watching TV, because when they're watching TV I can breathe for a second.

The other day I ran into my friend as I was walking away from kindergarten drop-off - I'd been late, and had had to walk my son through the office (tardy slip! #momfail) - but she was later; so late that she wasn't even bothering to rush. We laughed when we saw each other - no words needed, because we've both seen each other be "that mom," the one frantically waving her arms and rushing past the horde of on-time parents walking in the other direction, yelling WAITWAITWAITWAITWAIT! while the door to the classroom shuts in our face.

Back to that video: My "I'm such a failure as a parent" video. I know that it's a teeny, tiny thing, forgetting your child's sheet music (even when you do it often). But as I dropped him off - flustered, my daughter crying from the car because she'd dropped her paper crown and couldn't reach it, hurriedly trying to explain during the second between the door opening and it closing again that it's totally my fault, I'm really sorry, I promise it won't happen again - I felt ridiculous, like a cartoon of a disheveled parent. Surely the "real" moms out there remember their child's music for piano class. Surely they don’t have to scream at their children to walk faster! in order to get them to class before the bell; surely they restrict screen time to an hour per day (weekends only!).

DIARY

About Last Night

The best words I can use to describe last night's Halloween extravaganza: Laser. Focus. These two were ON TASK.

(First, can we please note that heart sunglasses make quite the perfect addition to a Belle costume?)

Now allow me to present to you the series of "family photos" my neighbor took of us. I'm going to tell you who I think won each shot; let's see if you concur.


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