About Last Night

The best words I can use to describe last night’s Halloween extravaganza: Laser. Focus. These two were ON TASK.

(First, can we please note that heart sunglasses make quite the perfect addition to a Belle costume?)

Now allow me to present to you the series of “family photos” my neighbor took of us. I’m going to tell you who I think won each shot; let’s see if you concur.

jordan Reid family halloween

Kendrick, definitely.

jordan Reid family halloween

This one’s a tough call, between the closed and/or wholly obscured eyes (Kendrick, Indy) and the mid-speech expressions (me, Goldie). I’m going to give Kendrick the win again, though, because my husband is physically incapable of looking at a camera and not doing something weird.

ramshackle glam family halloween

And finally, this one. This prize goes to the cat, who’s clearly the real star of these pictures, anyway.

(Oh my god, that cat. The YOWLING. Worst.)

ramshackle glam family halloween

“You guys are walking SO. SLOWLY.”

ramshackle glam family halloween

Being a parent on Halloween is 51% keeping your children alive, and 49% trying not to spill your Solo cup of wine on the stroller.

ramshackle glam family halloween

See how that pumpkin is blurry? That’s because it’s vibrating.

ramshackle glam family halloween

We need to have a quick conversation about this one, because Halloween is one thousand percent the culmination of all her three-year-old dreams. People just give you candy?! And you can EAT IT?!?

RIGHT NOW?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

ramshackle glam family halloween

“The sign said to take one piece. You only took one piece, right?”


“You can only take one.”

“No, five.”


“Five. In my bucket.”

(Guess who won this argument?)

ramshackle glam family halloween

Laser. Focus.

ramshackle glam family halloween

Finally, the night came to an end, and the weary travelers rolled home, put their candy neatly on a shelf, and then sat down to a healthy, balanced meal lovingly prepared by their mother in a burst of supreme foresight and wisdom.

ramshackle glam family halloween

I’m totally kidding. They ate ten thousand Kit Kats while watching Goosebumps, came into contact with not a single speck of soap or toothpaste, and passed out in their underwear.

In short: It was a hell of a Halloween, by which I mean “a perfect one.”

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