A Cure For Your Horrifyingly Dull Knives

Did you know you could be embarrassed by your knives? It's true. Three years ago, Alisa and Erin came over to cook paella at my house, and they were both horrified - truly horrified - at the extreme dullness of virtually all of my knives.

What's that? I should have sharpened them...ever?

Please, that would be far too responsible of me.


Three Apps Both My Kids And I LOVE

I am not an app person (except for Doodlejump; goodness, I love it). So when my son started getting into them, I was both perplexed ("how does") and nervous (what if he spends too much money? what if he fills up my entire phone? what if I look away for a second, and all of a sudden he's being shown NRA ads during commercial breaks?). But it turns out that the apps my son gravitates towards are amazing - so amazing that we literally spend hours (!) every single weekend (and, ok, some mornings, before my daughter wakes up) laying in bed playing them.

Consider this a PSA. Your kids will love these, and so will you.

Super Brain. This app asks you to solve riddles that require abstract thinking and somehow are equally suited to an eight-year-old I can actually feel myself growing smarter with this thing (and the fact that my son is way better than me at it is both depressing and wonderful).


I Have Unlocked The Riddle Of Cutting My Son’s Hair


I have always, despite any supporting evidence whatsoever, been wholly convinced that - if put to the task - I'd be fully capable of giving someone a decent haircut. I mean, I've gotten my hair cut! A lot! Doesn't that qualify me to take on the role of a actual trained human whose actual profession is haircutting?!

Yeah, so the first real haircut (apart from the baby years) I gave my son didn't go so well. I thought it was okay, or at least okay-ish, but then he arrived at my house a few days later with markedly different hair. Kendrick, it appeared, had been a little bit horrified by the state of his son's head and had taken matters into his own (or, rather, a professional's) hands.


5 Phenomenal Buys Under $20

Maybe shopping will make the feelings go away! 

Here's a sad fact for you: The actual most exciting moment in my day is when I hear the UPS or Amazon Prime delivery dude coming down the street. (Related: Yesterday my daughter whirled around, glared at me, and said "MOM. WHEN WILL THE CORONAVIRUS BE OVER?" ...Same, my love. Same.)

Anyway, here are some extremely affordable and truly wonderful purchases that I've discovered over the past few weeks (hooray for shopping-related dopamine hits! #whateverworks).


Brace Yourselves

Claire Zulkey, creator of the only newsletter I never, ever fail to open, Evil Witches, talks to teachers and administrators to get some answers to the questions on every parent's mind (spoiler: There aren't any good ones).

This weekend I had a socially distant backyard BYOB hangout with a middle school teacher friend of mine, and I asked her what she wishes parents knew about return-to-school. She said:

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