Where It’s At

Alright, so for those of you who are curious, here’s where we stand:

1. The house we had an accepted offer on fell through during inspections.

2. The house we originally fell in love with and lost started to fall through with the people who won it from us during the bidding war, and we were given another opportunity to make an offer, but then it didn’t fall through after all, and so we lost it for a second time.

3. We got all over-the-moon about another house (pictured above), which as a bonus was well within our Comfort Zone price range, and made an offer on it…and then yesterday we lost it in yet another bidding war.

I have to be honest, I’m about ready to give up. I’m just exhausted.

Also: I mean, obviously I’m not going to give up. And it’s true that job + childcare + looking for a house is a bunch to take on, but it’s doable with a little extra sleep-deprivation. And I really don’t want to sound like I’m having a Pity Party For One over here; like I said before, I get that this is a wonderful opportunity and I am so fortunate to be embarking on this journey at all…but…I mean, people told me it would be stressful.

But it is stressful. Italics-stressful.

Beyond all the time and the running around…the emotional weight of picturing a new life for yourself over and over and over, and then letting go of that life that you pictured over and over and over…in a way, it feels like you’re saying goodbye to memories each and every time you lose a place. Memories that haven’t happened yet…

but still.

And every time a property falls through, I can’t help but feel like I’m letting down my son in some small way. Is that crazy? Of course it’s crazy. But I want him to have the world, and I’m struggling with the idea that I’m having trouble giving him this one thing. Which is a big thing…

but still.

But hey, the longer we stay in this apartment the more money we save, and I suppose more properties will be coming on the market in the weeks to come, and…I mean, eventually someone will pick us, right?



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