Style

Girl Trouble

By which I mean “troubles with The Girls.”

Those girls.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve received two emails on opposite ends of the Breast Spectrum, and completely related to both of them.

Let’s take the first, from Cate:

My girls are 36 DD, which sounds nice in theory, but in reality means that beautiful, low cut v-necks immediately look like porn costumes.  The thing is, I hate the way a cotton tank looks layered under things that are theoretically meant to be worn bare. I’d love your thoughts on what might look sweet (and also cover things up).

Oh, I hear you, Cate. I’m a 34 D on a good day (and get myself up into E territory when pregnant, as I recently discovered), and I’m not big on low-cut shirts, either – it’s just not my look. I’m also not really into layering camis under tops – too much material, and I hate how the cami draws focus from the top and looks like an afterthought. It’s just so obvious what you were trying to do, right?

Anyway, what you need is a spectacular bra with zero padding that lifts and separates, rather than lifts and pushes together. Demi-cups are great for this, but it can be tough to find them sans pads. I’m a big fan of the Victoria’s Secret BioFit (pictured above), which features a low front and convertible straps, and has no padding and wider, more comfortable straps in the larger sizes. I also love Wacoal’s Halo Lace Strapless Underwire Bra; it’s been my go-to strapless for years now (I own it in both nude and black) because it’s incredibly comfortable and works underneath virtually any top.

The next question comes from Becki:

Hi Jordan,

I have a serious problem: I am done nursing [my son], and this has given me a huge sense of freedom but a major loss in my chest region. I went from a healthy D cup to now a semi-A cup…we are talking about a whole lot of NOTHING!! We leave for FL in less than 2 weeks and I am in need of some styling tips. I’m looking for flattering tops/swimwear that won’t break the bank!

Enough is enough: it has to be said, and those of you who have yet to be pregnant should just prepare yourselves going in. I’ve spoken with a lot of women about this over the past few months, and it’s just a fact: having a baby does very unkind things to your boobs. At the very least, they’ll end up looking…different. Not like the ones you’ve spent decades getting used to.

Overshare? Sorry. Maybe this isn’t a universal condition, but it’s an important possibility to get on your radar, and no one tells you about this beforehand. They should. It’s insane.

Anyway, since I’m still nursing I unfortunately have very little experience with A-cup Land, but what I can suggest (because if you went from a D to an A there’s probably a little support issue going on) is picking up an excellent bra that you don’t mind letting show a little under your tanks – you’ll get more lift than you would from a built-in bra, and it’s sexier, to boot. Since you’re going to Florida, I’d suggest neons, which will look great under neutral tanks (above, from left: Hanky Panky, Deborah Marquit, Forever 21).

And for swimwear, I’m getting back on the Victoria’s Secret train, because they make some incredible sets with lots of lift and padding, and other enhancing things like ruffles and sequins and large slogans that say BREASTS (essentially). Seriously, though, they’re really great suits, and are most certainly figure-enhancing (from left to right, that’s the 5-Way Push-Up Bandeau, the Forever Sexy Push-Up Bandeau, and my favorite, the Madi Bandeau). As an alternative, you could take advantage of your straighter figure and go for a suit that the bustier among us have more trouble with, like a one-piece with graphic cutouts.

Hope that helps!

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