Above: Jordan in a leather minidress massaging a box of french hand creams for work. Below: Me, trying to imagine what it’s like to be Jordan, lovingly gazing at a half-empty bottle of face toner.

by Erin

I’m one of those almost-40-year-old middle class white feminists who eschews the patriarchy but then spends like 5% of my income on skincare. Don’t tell me to smile, but if I do, know that 15 tons of retinol is keeping the trout mouth at bay. Is that what retinol even does? Actually, I have no idea. You should probably take beauty advice from me.

My friend Alisa has been trying to convince me to switch to natural deodorant for years. And for years, I have resisted despite the fact that I know that the aluminum in many deodorant brands has been linked to a host of illnesses, including breast cancer, because my only experiences with natural deodorants have been…shall we say, less than ideal. (OK, they were terrible. I have no idea how a deodorant can actually make you smell worse, but there you go.) 

But I’ve been hearing about Native Deodorant for awhile now - it’s one of those cult items that everyone who’s into natural products is all aflutter about. I posted about it on Instagram, asking whether anyone had tried it, and was stunned by the outpouring of love for the brand. So I tried it myself, and now I get it. It just…works. It’s great. And I especially love that the scents are subtle and unisex; I like the idea that one brand can work for the entire family (not that I’d share my deodorant with a man, but that’s another story). 

Every night of my life, I take a bath. But for the past two or so months, I have added several steps to this habit, because I have finally, at the tender age of 37, decided to try to actually put this whole "self-care" hoo-ha into practice.

And so every night, here is what I do:

1. Dry brush my entire body. (If you have never heard of dry-brushing, allow Gwyneth to explain it to you. It's great.)
2. Microplane my feet. This sounds disgusting, and is disgusting, but is also the single best method I have found for dealing with my horrifying foot situation. The first time I did it, I removed a shot glass's worth of dead skin from my feet, revealing all the baby softness that had apparently been there all along, and it was mayyyyybe the single most satisfying thing I have ever done in my life (ok, after this). 
3. Run a bath, into which I add a couple of drops of frankincense oil, and about 1/2 tsp rosewater.
4. Exit the bath, and (while my skin is still damp), coat myself from neck to toes with coconut oil into which I have mixed another drop or two of frankincense oil. And if you think frankincense oil will make you smell like a cathedral, let me tell you: it's this odd blend of musk and freshness, and it's definitely unique, but I love how it smells on the skin.
5. Apply yet another oil to my face (either Superfood or prickly pear oil).
6. Add yet another coat of coconut oil to my feet, and then put on socks to a) lock in the moisture and b) enable myself to get from bathroom to bedroom without breaking my neck because oil on the body is one thing, and oil on the soles of the feet is another, far more treacherous, situation.

If you're going to say that this all sounds like a whooooole lot of work...I mean, yeah. It is. But I also do it while catching up on The Bachelorette on my computer, and it's my Me Time. Non-negotiable.