Recipes

Eat

A Crappy Eater’s 100% Honest Review Of Daily Harvest

Fine, I admit it: I started ordering Daily Harvest mostly because a lady I saw in their Instagram ads looked so adorably thrilled with her life. But I also started ordering Daily Harvest because I tried a chocolate-based smoothie at a fancy smoothie place near my dance studio, and became obsessed with chocolate-based smoothies. Except chocolate-based smoothies that you buy at fancy smoothie places are like ten bucks, and I have better things to spend ten bucks on. Like three jumbo-sized bags of salt and vinegar potato chips.

My attention to nutritional value, in case you were curious, starts and stops with the question of whether or not existing solely on hastily-consumed discarded spoonfuls of (Annie's! Organic!) macaroni and cheese will eventually kill me. (I'm pretty sure it won't. Jury's still out.)

So having been a Daily Harvest subscriber for a couple of months now, and given the fact that I don't do things like subscribe to smoothie delivery-places, I figured it was time to give you my (100% honest, zero-sponsored) rundown.

Crafts for the Uncrafty

“Cave Of Wonders” Birthday Cake (With Rainbow Interior)

I want to be humble about this one, but it took me five hours, so I'm not going to be. (Granted, the creation process might have been slowed down ever-so-slightly by the fact that I was catching up on the 2-part season finale of The Bachelorette while fondant-ing, but STILL.)

So. To recap, the make-an-impossibly-fancy-birthday-cake-for-my-child tradition started with the Mermaid Cake (a process that began with my friend Alisa taking pity on me and teaching me how to make a cake that did not turn out like this).

Then came the Spooky Ghost Cake, the Moana Cake, the Bloodshot Eyeball Cake, and the Tie-Dye Rainbow Cake. This year my daughter suggested a "Moana Rainbow Unicorn Mermaid Cake," but I gently steered her in the direction of something a) new, and b) not that, because the chances of me executing that extremely specific vision were zero, and?

ENTREES

Sherry’s Most Perfectest Lasagna Ever (With A Secret Ingredient)

I've never been a huge fan of lasagna. I think that this dates back to a mild trauma when I was thirteen and announced that henceforth I would be a vegetarian, or at least until I changed my mind and wanted a hamburger one day (which did actually end up happening). My mother's reaction to this news was to completely ignore me and continue sneaking meat into meals anyway. She made her "special lasagna" frequently during this period, and it was a solid two years before she admitted that the "mushrooms" had, in fact, been...well, not mushrooms. (I was apparently not the most observant teenager.)

But apart from my mother's egregious conduct, I feel like lasagna should be more amazing than it usually is. I mean, it's layered pasta, cheese, and sauce. How could that not be absolutely perfect, every time? Except far too often I find lasagna has too much of one thing, and not enough of another. I want my lasagna to be red sauce-y, and cheesy, and otherwise uncomplicated by unnecessary additions like, say, peppers (BLECH).

For our girls' weekend in Tahoe, each of us was assigned a meal to prepare. This was Alisa's mom's friend Sherry's dish, and it was the best lasagna I have ever, ever, ever tasted (sorry, mom). The secret ingredient? A touch of cheddar cheese. I'm aware that that doesn't sound like a good idea, but this lasagna was transcendent. So you're going to have to trust me.

Recipes

Alisa’s Best Friend’s Mom’s Neighbor’s Friend’s “Top Secret” Dip (Oops)

Oh my god I LOVE THIS STORY. I'm in San Jose right now, plopped down at Alisa's dining room table, and I was all "ugh what should I write about today that involves NO FEELINGS WHATSOEVER."

"Food!" Alisa said. "You haven't written about food in forever!"

...This is true. So - and this is how I know Alisa is a true friend for the ages - she and I immediately set about figuring out what kind of brilliant recipe we could make right here and now, using ingredients that she already had. We dragged out her (perfectly organized, laminated, ughhhh) recipe binder, and started flipping through...and then we arrived at the Shasta Dip.

Eat

Your New Favorite Hot Drink: Cacao, Honey & Cream

I LOVE coffee. I need coffee. Like, in my bones. And if you had told me - as Francesca did - that there was a drink out there capable of making me want to wake up and drink it more than I want to wake up and drink coffee, I would have said you were lying.

(Have I mentioned how much I hate having to admit I was wrong? I hate it.)

Anyway, I was staying over at Francesca's house and she was all "let me make you this amaaaaaazing drink with unsweetened cacao powder and raw honey!" and I was all "no, I need you to give me my caffeine and stop trying to make me a person who ingests things like unsweetened cacao powder." But then I - reluctantly, obviously - tried it anyway, and there you go:


powered by chloédigital