Gift Ideas For Someone Who Is Just Like My Husband

Seriously, any headset. VR blows my mind, and AR* has seen better days.

*Actual Reality

The soundbar because I’m done with not understanding TV dialogue, and Vizio because I’m cheap.

Well, specifically R2-D2.  We have BB-8, and he’s seriously hilarious.  And, well, I just want an R2-D2 that I can make move around and sound like he just got zapped, which is super funny, ok?  And BB-8 would love him.

What does this have to do with getting more sleep?  I totally forgot that was the prompt, probably because sleeping is boring and makes me think of playing with toys. But whatever.  This is my list. So there.

What else do I need? Exercise!

I ain’t getting any younger, you know. And I’m an old-fashioned “Push-ups, Sit-ups, and Pull-ups are Good Enough for Me” kind of guy.  Except I can’t do pull-ups at home, so I always wait until I can go the gym at work, and then, well…you know.

I don’t.

So I’m getting a pull-up bar. Since this is my first foray into pull-up bar-dom, I literally googled “best pull-up bar” and picked this one because this one said it’s indestructible and versatile.  (but mostly because it’s cheap.  I don’t think I care about the fanciness of my pull-up bar. I’d probably feel better about myself if I built one from a young sapling from my childhood farm.  So. In absence of that, I’m getting a cheap pull-up bar and I’m going to use the heck out of it, darn it.

And yes, I’m buying it on ebay – why? Because I work for eBay? No! Because eBay’s awesome! That’s right.

Moving on to things I want, but don’t technically need (because we’re in the process of teaching our three-year-old this concept, I assume I should practice what I preach).

I want to take some lessons.  I’ve currently narrowed it down to: scuba lessons, sailing lessons, manual driving lessons, motorcycle riding lessons, Kung Fu classes, slide guitar lessons, and carpentry lessons.

So, since I can teach myself manual (if you want to make an omelette you have to break a few transmissions, amiright?), I can just get a motorcycle and figure it out (#solidplan), since I have a bottle and a guitar and access to YouTube, since I have tools and wood and the images of 1,000 Ikea dressers dancing through my head, and since a guy I work with told me I was too old to learn Kung Fu because my “System 1” brain is like an old dog that can’t learn new tricks…

I’m leaning toward Kung Fu.

I know nothing, but think this place and this place look pretty cool.  And then, one day, I can be like my hero Keanu Reeves, and utter the phrase, “I know kung fu.”

Back to one more “need” for a moment.

These organizations do great things in the world, and they deserve my support.

But really, what I want to do is go somewhere myself and help with my own hands.  And I really really really want to do that with my kids. So this holiday season, I’m going to take my son and daughter to volunteer.

I figure I’ll pick from this list, which looks like exactly what I want to do.  See you there?

In IMAX.  Which come with a free Star Wars poster on Fandango.

Just kidding, I already bought them.

It’s like $30 now. Reliving Kendrick’s 1992 is now only $30 on eBay (what’s up eBAYYYYYYY!). Reliving Kendrick’s 1996 might cost you more than $120. So which Bill Clinton term do you like best?

I have a George Costanza wallet.  And I’m ready for everyone in my life not to tell me that anymore.

Come to think of it, my grandfather gave me a money clip with a diamond in it back when I was in high school, and I still have it.  I think I’ll start using that.

Thanks, Grandpa. Miss you.

I haven’t had a bike, let alone many bikes, which would necessitate a bike rack, for quite some time, but now I have a bike, and I have delusions of wading across bubbling California streams, muddy bike on shoulder, birds chirping, and in the background is my Subaru Outback with a beautiful bike rack on top. This is the cheapest Yakima one, which looks fine to me.

Hey, efficiency is important. And besides, I worked hard promoting these, guys. Show some love!

These are great for people who have to wear dress shoes but really wish they didn’t.