My Looks

Journey’s End

Years ago, when I graduated college, my father and I took my white convertible on a cross-country road trip. We wound down the East Coast towards New Orleans, flew up through an empty, hot Texas, and landed in Santa Fe. I ate burritos with green chiles for breakfast, bought dreamcatchers by the side of the road, and found a hot pink fringed shawl to wrap myself in when the sun set and the desert air turned cold. When we reached the end of the line, we parked my car outside a grey apartment building on a side street off of the Sunset Strip in Los Angeles. We unpacked boxes and assembled Ikea furniture, and when we were done I tossed that fringed shawl across the foot of my bed and it instantly felt like home.

What’s so crazy about this summer is that we’ve been on this wild journey, pulling our hands off the wheel and taking roads that we won’t be certain make sense until we find out where they lead, and this feeling of who-knows-where-we’re-going isn’t just confined to our living situation: it’s our life. Coming with us everywhere we’ve been these past couple of months is a person whose face we’ve never seen, and who, in just a few days – hours maybe – will be a bigger part of every moment of our days than we can possibly imagine, right now in the just-before. I have no idea who she’ll be or what she’ll do to our hearts, but I am certain that she will make everything different.

Right now we’re coming to the end of another long journey, and we’re nervous and restless and all the things you’d expect us to be, but we’re also wandering together through sandy mountains, laying in a bed that doesn’t belong to us and feeling the foot of a family member we haven’t met yet move under my skin, riding ponies and breathing in ocean and drinking milkshakes in the mornings. There’s so much upheaval and uncertainty, but it doesn’t feel uncomfortable, exactly – it feels like it’s just how it is right now, both because of where we are and because of us. It couldn’t be any other way, but even if it could…I wouldn’t want it to. That’s been the most surprising part of all.

I guess what this upside-down summer has taught us is that we don’t need a whole lot to make us feel like we’re home – just each other, and maybe a fringed scarf to wrap around our shoulders when the wind picks up at night.

california style

maternity bohemian 

half moon bay

ramshackle glam pregnant

road trip style

On Me: Anthropologie Tank and Scarf; AG Denim for Destination Maternity Jeans; Peyton Bag ℅ Lauren Merkin; Sunday Somewhere Sunglasses; Samantha Wills Earrings; Nine West Vintage America Boots (similar styles here).

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