Baby

Pre-Baby Prep

Early-morning walk

A few last-minute things I’ve been checking off my list prior to Goldie’s arrival:

1. Gel Pedicuring. Have I mentioned how amazing gel pedicures are? They are amazing. They last forevvver, and since I am lazy about getting to the salon generally and anticipate extra-laziness about making time for the salon in the coming months, this is a good thing. I went for neon orange sort of by accident – it looked coral in the sample, and then turned fluorescent on my nails – but hey, it’s August, and toes that look like little glowworms never killed anyone. (I was going to get a gel manicure, too, but my nails are looking like they need a break from polish, so I’m going the cleanly-filed-and-bare route for a bit.)

2. Bang Trimming. Not “bangs,” exactly (I’m over them for the time being), but rather “a few shorter pieces of hair in the front part of my head.” Why? Because when I have zero time to deal with styling my hair, my go-to solution is to throw it all up into a messy bun, and then just blow-dry those shorter front pieces with a round brush and let them fall where they like.

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3. Loose Black Pant-Purchasing. You know what I had written down as one of the things I should pack in my hospital bag, in the event that it is an especially hot day and I don’t feel like wearing long pants home?

WHITE SHORTS.

White. Shorts.

I have to blame some kind of pregnancy mind-freeze for this one, because literally – and I mean LITERALLY – the last thing you want to wear after giving birth to an entire human being are white shorts. White shorts! So let’s just move on from that total-disengagement-from-reality blip and never mention it again.

White shorts.

Anyway, last time I was in the hospital I basically lived in these loose, cozy black pants that of course I forgot to bring with me, so: one trip to the Gap later I am the owner of these, and they are wonderful and strangely chic and I love them.

Pre-Baby Purchases

4. Robe-Purchasing. Another thing I forgot is really useful during the early days after a baby’s arrival, when people are stopping by to see the baby (not that I have that many “people” out here, but I do have a couple) and you are also doing things like getting semi-naked every thirty seconds in order to breastfeed: a nice, comfortable, but still visitor-appropriate (meaning streamlined as opposed to Wookie-ish) robe. Gap again.

5. Shipping. I’m anticipating a cross-country flight with a newborn and a toddler and all our stuff being somewhere rather high on the Holy Shit This Is Stressful scale, so I’m trying to send as much ahead of us as I can. I’d rather focus on corralling children than yet another carry-on bag that contains exclusively items that will get me yelled at in the security line.

6. Eyelash Extending. Are eyelash extensions fussy and mildly Kardashian-y and not exactly of the highest priority when what one should be focusing on is the arrival of a new life? Sure. And am I getting them anyway? Yes ma’am, and tomorrow in fact, because here is what happens once a newborn arrives: 1) You forget that your face exists, to the detriment of things like how it looks; 2) Twenty zillion photographs get taken, and you are in a lot of them. And I think eyelash extensions are a wonderful solution for those times when makeup isn’t really on the menu (see also: vacations involving a lot of swimming and raccoon-eye potential). Call me Kim.

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