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Host Etiquette

Kendrick and I are hosting his best friend from high school for a few days (see our repurposed couch – including totally-not-appreciated-by-guys-daisy-on-pillow, next picture), and while I am mildly put out at the idea of picking up after two whole boys for a week, I do believe that hosting etiquette is very important.

Here are my (admittedly, only intermittently employed) tips on how to be the best possible host:

1. Be unfailingly cheerful. No domestic squabbles; no chiding your guests for anything at all (including leaving their jackets/suitcases/dirty towels/dishes in the middle of the floor).

2. Don’t overwhelm your guests when they arrive. Hand them a drink (coffee, water, wine, or a shot of whiskey, depending on the hour), show them around briefly, and then let them be. They’ve been traveling all day; now is their first opportunity to relax.

3. If they’re staying for more than two nights, make sure they have a key so they don’t feel like they’re a burden.

4. Bake something (even Pillsbury chocolate chip cookies do the trick). It makes the apartment smell nice, and it lets them know that there’s something for them to eat.

5. Put away your personal things. Embarrassing/potentially awkward medications, “grown-up-type” items (hee), that dust bunny that’s been hiding in the corner of the living room for three months…all of these should be MIA by the time your buddies step through the door. Possibly also stow away flea-market purchases that declare “nuestros corazones unidos para siempre” (“our hearts united forever”), which may be vaguely gender-specific and thus fodder for some husband-ribbing on the part of his best friend.

6. Maybe don’t write blog posts that begin, “I hate houseguests”? Just a thought. (Don’t worry; I cleared this entire post with the very charming, respectful, actually fabulous houseguest Matt in advance.)

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